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Specific help – The limits of help – Look after yourself – In bereavement – it is different for everyone – It is a long up and down process - Does anything help? – Keep on remembering – Prayers which may be helpful .

Drawing on our experiences, we provide examples of what needs to be done and where help can be found to deal with the challenges and pain of facing up to death and dying – of relatives, friends, colleagues of all ages, and not least ourselves.

At the time of death. Obtaining a Medical Certificate. Registering a Death. Lasting Power of Attorney. Making a Will. Planning a Funeral. The funeral service. Other funeral arrangements. Funerals in other religious communities.

When we are either facing our own mortality or alongside someone who is possibly close to death, our hearts cry out to God, perhaps yearning for miraculous intervention, yet so often the illness progresses before our watering eyes. This chapter addresses this dilemma, shows how ‘healing’ involves rather more than a physical cure and suggests ways of praying for and trusting in the transforming presence of Jesus.

Talking about our fears – Phobias - Doing something about it - “Fear not”.

Different views - Eastern religions – Judaism - Christianity and Islam – Tolerance - The resurrection of Jesus - The Christian Hope: this present world - God’s purpose for us - the Kingdom of God - the life to come - the choice - life after death - the Good News - The importance of talking about life after death - Sharing the Good News - Faith.

Children and death – The death of a pet – General understanding of death in childhood – Teenagers – Spiritual understanding of death – The death of a parent or main carer – Ongoing concerns – Death of a parent or main carer from suicide – The death of a brother or sister – The death of a child – Talking to a child who is expected to die – Deciding not to talk – children’s questions – Consider asking for help – Information step by step – How will my family cope? – Medical decisions - The sudden death of a child - UK deaths in childhood in 2014.

Miscarriage, Stillbirth and Neonatal death – Three stages of pregnancy – Early and late miscarriage – Will there be a birth certificate after miscarriage? – What happens to the baby after a miscarriage? – Stillbirth – Holding your stillborn baby – Should there be a postmortem of a still born baby? – Saying goodbye – Registering a stillborn baby - Will there be a funeral? – Neonatal Death – Sudden unexpected death In infancy - How can family and friends help? – Sources of help.

Talking about the possibility of suicide is important - Suicide is not uncommon - Efforts to reduce the risk - The bereaved survivors - Talking and practical help.

Five examples of the challenge responding to the sudden death – of a spouse, a son, a mid-career teacher, a recently retired teacher wife and mother; and a teenage neighbour.

Growing old – The limits of modern medicine – Fears about Dying – Palliative/hospice- type care of the dying – If you could choose how would you like to die? – Dementia – A different sort of pain – Access to hospice care – Dying at home – Physician assisted suicide – Euthanasia – the withdrawal of treatment – The use of strong pain medication at the end of life – The legal situation – Compassion and dignity – As good a death as possible – Purposeful living – How do we die?

Deciding about treatment – No further useful treatment - Stopping treatment – Is treatment ever denied because of expense? – Cardiopulmonary resuscitation (CPR) – Do not attempt resuscitation (DNAR) – Advanced decision/directive – Power of attorney – Decisions for the elderly.

The time of diagnosis – Telling others – Time: a healer – Explanations from health care staff – Keeping in touch with your GP – Time from friends, family and communities – Goals and interests – Renewing contacts – Ways of coping – Having a purpose – Treatment ending – Continued fear – Support organisations.

Describes wrestling with how respond to hearing from an old friend that he had inoperable liver cancer - and why silence will not do. Summarises what is covered in the rest of the book.